Revenge IS like a poison, or, The necessity of awareness.

I’m not someone who’s ever been into revenge. It never solves the problem, it’s never as satisfying as the movies and Shakespeare make it out to be, and it’s more than a small waste of time. All of this, plus the fact that my problems don’t get better by making someone else feel worse, means that I’m one of those who believes that the best “revenge” is living well.

And then I got rejected from touring a consulting company’s headquarters.

Disclaimer: If you’re a recruiter and you’re reading this: 1) Thanks for reading. 2) This is one of those stories with a happy ending that hopefully still includes you hiring me. Also, as I’ve now spoiled the ending of this post for you, the least you can do is read ‘till the end.

That’s a lot to italicize.

Anyway, normally, this rejection wouldn’t be a big deal. I’ve applied for more scholarships than I can remember, and I’ve only ever won a handful. This wasn’t even an application that required a lot of effort-they just wanted a resume and transcript. By all accounts, this one should’ve slid off my back like the others. Sure it’d add to the dry streak I’ve been on for wins lately, but hey, those happen.

And then this firm decided to come to my school to run a case competition.

For you non-business readers (you’re great too!), a case competition is an event where you and a team are given a package of information about a real-life problem a company is facing. In this competition, we would have four hours to come up with a solution and present it to a panel of professors and company representatives.

A normal person would have perceived this as “Oh, cool, a case competition”. But in my weird, glory-deprived state of mind, I thought of it as “You come to my territory, to challenge me to present?” Presenting is the thing I do best, and I made it a personal mission to show this firm what they had missed out on.

And here’s the problem: I became so focused on winning that I failed to learn very much from the competition. Think about how much time I wasted-instead of learning to think more like a consultant, I was strategizing the best way to deliver an “oh, by the way, you rejected me” at the winners’ lunch.

Consider how often you’ve gone into a situation with a negative attitude-a club meeting, a lecture, even a date. I was looking for any excuse to call out the firm and show them how awesome a candidate they were missing out on. These were actions I didn’t take, but in hindsight, actions that would have only validated their rejection of me.

The best I can do is tell you to be more aware, as I know I’ll be. You might not be able to control how you feel, but you can at least know you’re being affected and compensate.

Sure, there’ll be other case competitions, just like how you might have that lecture every Tuesday. But that date could be once-in-a-lifetime. Be aware enough to be at your best.

Editor’s note: If you have a topic idea, I’d love to hear from you! Suggestions can be made in the comments section or on Twitter @JeremyDeMello. Also, if you understand the reference in my title, you’re wonderful.